A few weeks ago I was thinking about what I should give up for Lent. I've tried in the past to give up alcohol, chocolate and bread (not all in one year) and I don't think I ever succeeded with the full 40 days.
This year I've decided to give up dating app's/internet dating. I didn't want to say I'd give up dating all together because it would be just my luck that I would bump into the man of my dreams. I know I spend a lot of time using the apps so I thought it would be good to have a break from them all.
I haven't actually used the apps that much for few months now. When I get bored, I find I'll have a quick look at the apps but most of the time I don't even bother to read all the messages, let alone reply to them.
In the past two or three months, I think I've been on dates with four different guys. That may sound quite a lot to some people but before, some weeks I was going on 'first met/dates' with two or three guys each week.
It's pretty rare that I meet someone from these apps and it progresses to a second date. I'm so damn picky or I just don't know what I want from someone. So I don't feel bad being a serial dater as I still stand by the first time you meet someone in person from these apps, it's really not a typical first date.
I always see the first time you meet someone as a chance to see if there is that famous 'spark'. This spark isn't something from a fairy tale, it really is as simply as finding someone attractive, being able to hold a decent conversation with them and there being lots of laughter.
Perhaps I'm being a bit cheeky by giving these dating apps up for Lent as it's actually something I think I should do anyway. Lots of people have told me to just forget the apps and meet someone the 'normal' way.
I'd love to just bump into someone and strike up a conversation and see what happens but as I mentioned in another post, people don't live in the real world. You look around and all you see is people plugged into technology.
Whether it's listening to music, watching a show on their smart phone or reading a book on your kindle people barely register others around them so it's hard to strike up that conversation.
By being offline for 40 days, it will free up more time for me to be in the real world. I usually check Tinder when there's an advert on the TV or I'll look at POF on my commute into work. Now I can concentrate on me. I can read, I can learn and I can just relax.
I've actually decided to stop using them all now and not wait until Lent. I didn't realise how many profiles I had. Tinder, POF, Hinge, OkCupid, Match, Guardian Soulmate... and there were a few other random ones too. I didn't just hide my profile either, I actually deleted them all.
It feels good to be switched off. It may not help with these blog posts but I'm sure I can think of other things to write about. Maybe I'll share a little bit about M... The very lovely guy I've had three dates with in one week :-)
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